Mia Khalifa interracial threesome

“Black Monster Cock,” “24 Inches of Pain” and “Black Cock Ripping White Hoes Apart” are all headlines I see browsing through interracial porn sites. In the previews an Aryan proudly holds a fat, plump tootsie roll in her hand and smiles at the camera. In the next picture most of it has disappeared in her mouth and she has a serious, concentrated look on her face as if she is deep in thought, contemplating the mysteries of the universe. In the next preview picture, the black cock has forced itself deep into her anus, stretching it to the brink of rupture. It is unclear by the look on the blonde’s pallor face whether she is enjoying this sexual expedition – screaming out in pleasure – or whether she is hating it – screaming out in pain. The next picture shows this woman with a black cock aimed into her mouth, her tongue and lips glazed in cum, looking both humiliated and relieved.

The black cock in my pornography collection is rarely under 8 inches long. It is black, not brown, and circumcised. There are no people attached to my black cock, other than white women. I do not want to see the face of the men having sex. What I want to see is the woman. I want to see her in pain. I want her to bee wincing, screaming, writhing, begging her partner to stop. I want to see my white women appear weak, dominated, humiliated and abused. I do not want to see black cock in a pussy. This indicates that the woman may be enjoying this experience. For the same reason, I do not want to see this woman touching herself during the ordeal.

I am not a black man or a white woman. I am, in fact, a white man. I do not have any black friends. When I am out of my home and I see a black man, I get nervous. I avoid eye contact. Then, afterwards, I feel ashamed. Why should I feel differently about black men than white men?

Then I go home and masturbate to interracial pornography. The more violent and objectifying it is, the more it turns me on. I imagine that I am the one who is being fucked by a large, dominating black man. I imagine feeling the uncomfortable, burning, painful, unbearable sensation of a large black cock tearing its way through my asshole. I imagine being choked by the cock forcing its way down my throat. The black man is yelling racist obscenities at me. I am his white bitch. He smacks me hard with an open hand across my face, leaving a red mark. Then he cums in my mouth. It is disgusting, and I want to throw up. But he won’t let me swallow. Instead I have to sit there, my throat and ass sore as hell, feeling absolutely humiliated, just so some stranger can get off. The longer I sit there with the cum in my mouth the stronger the taste becomes. Finally I am allowed to swallow it.

I have tasted my own cum twice. Both times I found it to be the worst tasting thing I have ever had. I felt ashamed and embarrassed for having tried it. I’ve also inserted objects into my anus and hated that as well. These experiences have not lessened my appetite for violent interracial porn, though. Instead they have intensified it. It allows me to imagine the pain and humiliation associated with such sex more vividly. Looking back at the times I have tried anal and cum play by myself and felt ashamed for doing so, it arouses me. It did not do so when I actually did it. It was not the good kind of dirty feeling at the time, but when I am hard it is the good kind of dirty.

One of the most unusual things about my sexuality is that I can only be turned on by the thought of having sex with a black man. Not only that, but the thought of having sex with a white man is not a turn on. It is not even men that I am turned on by – it is the idea of them having sex with me. If I look at gay porn, it is not a turn-on. It does nothing for me then to make me feel a bit disgusted.

Sometimes I think about posting something online. I will ask a non-feminine black man to meet me somewhere. Then he will fuck the shit out of me, leaving me sore and humiliated. He will not get me off in return. Once he has gotten off and left his load in my mouth or ass, he will leave, maybe throw a few bucks my way, and I will go home where I will masturbate to the experience once I have distanced myself from the shame I will get from it. This may even become a regular thing. Every week I will meet him and get used by him from cold, humiliating, meaningless sex. There will be no talking, kissing or friendliness of any kind. Maybe he will bring a friend or two along sometimes. I won’t be turned on during this. No, the sexual excitement is from the memory not the actual act.

I don’t think I actually want to do any of this. I think there is a reason why I haven’t done any of it. But maybe I am just lying to myself. Maybe that is the reason I wrote this. Maybe I wrote this to attract a man who wants to do this to me. Maybe I wrote this so that I could find a girlfriend who understands my dark (no pun intended), self-hating sexual desires. On the other hand, maybe I wrote this because exposing this part of my sexuality is embarrassing, and that turns me on. That would mean that this is nothing more than a writers attempt at masturbating through words. Or maybe I’m just bored.

Actors: Mia Khalifa

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